Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Nicole vs. Life
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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