Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
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