Your mouth is God's brothel.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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