You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
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