Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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