just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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