and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
from now on my penis is your penis
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
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He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
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yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.