Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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