Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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