I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
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