Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?

  (323): View more from California

  Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (415): Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________? (323): Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her http://tfl.nu/qxlw
  Replies (3) Good night (1360) Bad night (586)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism http://tfl.nu/kj7t
  Replies (28) Good night (4584) Bad night (711)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid. http://tfl.nu/8g2q
  Replies (18) Good night (1015) Bad night (4647)
• Favorite

  (301): View more from Maryland

  I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (301): I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids http://tfl.nu/xnc7
  Replies (19) Good night (7077) Bad night (1069)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER? http://tfl.nu/yz8w
  Replies (14) Good night (5618) Bad night (1318)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement? http://tfl.nu/kphp
  Replies (6) Good night (5406) Bad night (1407)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend. http://tfl.nu/v7b4
  Replies (16) Good night (1648) Bad night (7542)
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off. http://tfl.nu/a9zf
  Replies (17) Good night (4273) Bad night (981)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette. http://tfl.nu/g7cy
  Replies (2) Good night (1456) Bad night (685)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (832): Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage. http://tfl.nu/2oqv
  Replies (1) Good night (2290) Bad night (875)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people. http://tfl.nu/j7bv
  Replies (10) Good night (1922) Bad night (856)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?

  (1-913): View more from Kansas

  I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink? (1-913): I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith. http://tfl.nu/78li
  Replies (8) Good night (1488) Bad night (666)
• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI. http://tfl.nu/ewv2
  Replies (6) Good night (1776) Bad night (587)
• Favorite

  (830): View more from Texas

  Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?

  (210): View more from Texas

  Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine

  (830): View more from Texas

  drunken problem solving at its finest

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (830): Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra? (210): Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine (830): drunken problem solving at its finest http://tfl.nu/2c5e
  Replies (2) Good night (1222) Bad night (430)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too. http://tfl.nu/il0e
  Replies (2) Good night (719) Bad night (376)

Randomize