so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Randomize
