Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
Just woke up from a first date on the futon watching Arrested Development by myself, him cuddling another chick in his room. Simultaneously the best and worst one night stand in history.
Bonus: took me 2 hours to get home on the streetcar cause I spent my cab money on drinks for his friend last night.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
