hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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