margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
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i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
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We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"