my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize