Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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