Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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