wrigley field is MILF paradise
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Randomize