when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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