Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight