she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
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