Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize