marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I should be sponsored by Trojan
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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