I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
Randomize
