I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
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