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Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
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