help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.