Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
