no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Hey
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GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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