I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
