new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Randomize
