this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
