I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.