Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize