Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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