just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize