YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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