some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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