why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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