Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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