Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.