So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
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