I hate ducks.
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
I made him laugh his dick is mine
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life