Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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