she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
So much Jack, so little girl.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
Randomize
