I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
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