haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize