girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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