i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
