She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
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