Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize