Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?