Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?

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  (407): is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town? http://tfl.nu/vkff
  Replies (35) Good night (739) Bad night (2058)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.

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  (512): I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related. http://tfl.nu/b1mq
  Replies (30) Good night (3748) Bad night (980)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.

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  (360): While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever. http://tfl.nu/mdyd
  Replies (16) Good night (6617) Bad night (908)
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  (760): View more from California

  The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.

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  (760): The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper. http://tfl.nu/pbch
  Replies (11) Good night (1108) Bad night (6659)
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.

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  (360): Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up. http://tfl.nu/js3s
  Replies (14) Good night (5220) Bad night (1382)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.

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  (317): Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will. http://tfl.nu/znpi
  Replies (10) Good night (2523) Bad night (1024)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!

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  (708): Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player! http://tfl.nu/3jxt
  Replies (8) Good night (3689) Bad night (758)
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.

  (319): View more from Iowa

  You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.

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  (630): So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead. (319): You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you. http://tfl.nu/03d8
  Replies (15) Good night (2431) Bad night (1275)
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  other than the jail part I had a really good time with you

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  (615): other than the jail part I had a really good time with you http://tfl.nu/dcut
  Replies (3) Good night (1855) Bad night (657)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked

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  (734): Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked http://tfl.nu/0uzi
  Replies (5) Good night (1165) Bad night (372)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.

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  (703): Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck. http://tfl.nu/9cle
  Replies (1) Good night (842) Bad night (519)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?

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  (651): Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you? http://tfl.nu/w903
  Replies (2) Good night (738) Bad night (367)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample

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  (306): apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample http://tfl.nu/rtrx
  Replies (6) Good night (1537) Bad night (457)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.

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  (256): I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth. http://tfl.nu/vzie
  Replies (0) Good night (538) Bad night (314)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.

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  (413): So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time. http://tfl.nu/h95e
  Replies (3) Good night (762) Bad night (515)

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